Finding Perfect Love

By Misty Zdanski

Oct 08
Finding perfect love

To feel deeply connected and loved is the ultimate desire that seems to elude us for some reason, even when we are in a committed relationship.

Why is that? Why is this ultimate love so elusive?

We grew up with the Disney Princess stories, the “happily ever after” dream. The fantasy that we had our very own Prince Charming out there somewhere waiting to sweep us off our feet! Only to still be waiting…and waiting…and…waiting.

Again, why?

We tend to look outward to make us feel better, to feel loved and valued. This alone sets us up for disappointment after disappointment with some good moments mixed in. How others treat us is how we view ourselves and then we keep repeating those patterns, some good, most not so good. We continue to allow others to define us or tell us how we are supposed to act without even realizing that we are allowing it.

Take a moment and really think about what defines you as a person. Who instilled those values in you, and are they in alignment with who you believe you are or want to be? The answer should be yes, but if it’s not, it’s ok. Now is the time to turn inward and get in alignment.

The one important piece of information to know is that we are all beautiful souls, each and every one of us. We all deserve love, even those that show ugliness to the world through their actions deserve love. That is God’s intention and desire for us. We are supposed to live in our Divinity, our Authentic Self. Who God sees us as, not society, friends, enemies, etc.

How do we get this love? We first love ourselves – and I mean really love ourselves!

One exercise that I constantly have people do is what I learned from Louise Hay: Every morning, look into a mirror and say “I Love You”.

Sounds simple, doesn’t it?! It may actually be one of the hardest things to do. It may come out in a whisper. Eye contact may be broken. An uncomfortable feeling may bubbling up inside. That’s a clue that some inner work needs to be done.

Up the ante and try this naked, especially if there are weight issues! How does that feel? Regardless of how we look or what’s going on in our lives, self-love and compassion should be strong and unwavering. Love is at the core of who we are and how we show up in the world. We are the shining light of God.

Self Love is what helps shape our lives and helps us through those difficult moments that seem unbearable. Connecting with our Higher Self and Higher Power/Source/God/”insert your preference here” guides and comforts us daily, with unconditional love. How do we tap into that? Do we even feel like we deserve unconditional love?

We have been conditioned to not look inward. That’s selfish or egotistical, the world would say. “Be respectful”,  “Act like a lady”, “Treat others with respect”, and the conditioning goes on and on. Those are outward appearances, which are great lessons to live by, but what about us and how we feel and show up in the world? What about our Authentic Self?

Our Authentic Self naturally loves and respects others because we love and respect ourselves. When we are in touch with our Divine Self, we brings love and peace to our lives! But we have to be willing to turn inward. How are we showing up? What are we avoiding and why? What negative event in our lives is still holding court in our subconscious mind which is making us view the world from that pain?

It’s time to answer those questions and the time is now, especially with the feeling of chaos in the world right now, to turn inward and connect with your Authentic Self. You are Love and by showing up in the world from this place, you can help heal the world. Tall demand, I know!

That’s the Big Picture view, so let’s back up a few hundred steps to how you can float above the chaos through practicing Self Love. The first step is to say I Love You in that mirror until you feel this beautiful energy of love glowing throughout your body. How do you achieve that ultimate feeling? You turn inward to notice any uncomfortable aches and pains in the body and you focus on that area. You talk to that area (weird at first, but very effective!). You tap into your intuition to guide you. And you take action to release any negative feelings and beliefs that no longer serve you. Simple, right?!

The topic of living in your Divinity is a very special topic for me. I have a strong desire to help others access their Higher Self and live the life they deserve, especially when it comes to finding a SoulMate with whom they can share that Divinity. If that’s something you’ve been seeking, then please join me at Zenquility on Saturday, October 28th to take the first steps in Finding Perfect Love. During that meetup, you’ll complete a private SoulMate Readiness Assessment and reveal areas in your life that may be preventing you from finding love within yourself and with a partner.